B2-19 · Dear Kraków: An American Looks at the Poles

Dear Kraków: An American Looks at the Poles

A blog post by Ryan Mitchell, a teacher from Ohio who has lived in Poland for three years.

When I told my friends in Columbus that I was moving to Kraków, most of them asked the same question: "Isn't that in Russia?" Three years later, I can confidently say that it is not, and that I have learned more about Poles – and about myself – than I ever expected. Here are the things that surprised me most.

1. Nobody smiles at strangers (and that's OK)

In the US, we smile at everyone: the cashier, the bus driver, the guy walking his dog. My first week in Kraków, I smiled at a woman on the tram, and she looked at me as if I were trying to steal her purse. I later learned that for many Poles, smiling at strangers seems fake or suspicious. A smile here has to be earned. The good news is that when a Pole finally smiles at you, it really means something.

2. "How are you?" is a real question

In America, "How are you?" means "hello". The correct answer is "Good, thanks!" even if your dog just died. In Polish, Jak się masz? is a genuine question, and you may get a ten-minute answer about someone's back pain, their boss and the price of butter. I find this honesty refreshing. Poles don't pretend everything is great. In fact, complaining seems to be something of a national sport.

3. Shoes off!

The first time I visited a Polish friend's apartment, I walked straight into the living room in my sneakers. The silence was deafening. Here, you take your shoes off at the door, and you will usually be offered a pair of slippers (kapcie). Every Polish household seems to own a basket of slippers for guests, in all sizes. I now own three pairs myself.

4. Mushrooms are serious business

Poland is a country of forests and of mushroom hunters. On autumn weekends, cities seem to empty as people head to their działka (a small garden with a hut) or to the woods with a basket and a knife. They pick mushrooms with almost scientific seriousness. My colleague once showed me a mushroom and said, "This one is delicious. That one, almost identical, will kill you." I have not gone mushroom hunting alone since.

5. Food is love

Every American has heard about pierogi, but nobody warned me about Polish hospitality. At a family dinner, the soup is followed by meat, potatoes, salads, cakes and more cakes. A Polish grandmother (babcia) keeps filling your plate until you leave a little food on it, and even then she asks if you are sure you're not hungry. Saying "no" is not really an option. I have gained five kilos in three years, and I regret nothing.

6. Dark humor and quiet pride

Polish humor took me a while to understand. It is dry, ironic and often dark. People joke about history, politics and themselves, and they can quote whole scenes from absurd old comedies like Miś (Teddy Bear), which make fun of life under communism. At the same time, Poles are quietly proud of things the world doesn't know enough about: Copernicus, Marie Curie, Chopin, Solidarity, the mathematicians who first broke the Enigma code, and a football match at Wembley in 1973 that their grandparents can still describe minute by minute.

What I'll take home

One day I'll probably move back to Ohio. When I do, I'll take a few Polish habits with me. I'll take my shoes off at the door. I'll go to the woods on Sunday (with a guide). And maybe I'll stop answering "Great!" when I'm not.

But I'll keep smiling at strangers. Some things you just can't change.